Meet Jane.

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Jane has no gains.

Jane works out semi regularly to counteract nights of drinking and bouts of carbicide. She’s 20 with an average BMI. Janes loves sweets and food too much to drastically change her eating habits so she’s resolved to exercise her way to skinny. Somehow her weight keeps going in the wrong direction. When she works out, she hits the elliptical or recumbent bike for 30-40 minutes with her headphones in so she can follow Dr. Phil on TV. She knows squats are all the rage (as they should be), so she does a couple light sets of quarter squats followed by some hip thrusts and few other weird exercises she saw on instagram with no real plan. She does some sit ups and lat pull downs with highly questionable form and refuses to ask anyone for advice or help with technique.  Jane doesn’t want to risk getting too big and muscly – gross. Jane has been going to the gym 2-3 times a week for almost a year but hasn’t really gotten any stronger or improved her overall body shape. Working out is a waste of time, thinks Jane. Genetics are to blame.

Meet Kane.

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Kane has no gains.

Kane has been pounding out the same 4 day bro-split with his buddies for the past 5 years. Kane has never gained more than 15 pounds over his starting weight. He takes plenty of supplements and feels like hes eating a lot. Kane has been stuck at the same strength level more or less for the past 3-4 years so he tries to go for maximum intensity on every set. While Kane knows he should be hitting 10 reps each set, he often comes up short with 8, 7 or even 5 as his workout progresses and he gets tired. Kane lifts as heavy as possible but tends to cheat in order to complete most reps. Kane watches bodybuilding videos on form, yet keeps running into shoulder injuries and back pain. He also prefers sit down leg machines over Deadlifts and Squats so he can better “isolate”. Kane’s muscularity is awkward and not well rounded. His posture is bad, he’s weaker on his left side, he has duck feet, gorilla arms, and forward shoulder/head posture. Kane’s glutes are barely there – but who cares, butts are for girls. Bros like Kane know that bitties just wants to see his big arms and chest.

Meet Shane.

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Shane has no gains.

Shane does Crossfit. Shane likes the feeling of being extremely exhausted and sweaty while doing very complicated movements with heavy weights despite being a beginner. His multiple ankle and shoulder injuries are a thing of pride for Shane because injuries show his intensity and dedication to the cult I MEAN FITNESS. Shane see’s how jacked his weekend-course -certified instructors are. Shane believes Crossfit is the way to get as fit as them.

SO WHAT?

Cesar Milan taught you how to be a good dog owner. Survivorman taught you how to survive alone in Nunavut for no reason. Young Drivers taught you how to drive. School taught you math. University taught you how to think. The Kardashians taught you vocal fry and how to be woman of the year. Personal Trainers teach you how to train for fitness with the most current science. Sure, you can do it on your own – but should you?

If you want to see results and progress when you workout, don’t be like Jane, Kane or Shane. Get a Certified Personal Trainer and LET THE GAINS BEGIN!

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(This guy. Mostly give your money to this guy)

  • Learn the principles of training
  • Unlike a GoodLife trainer or Crossfit coach, a CPT is bound by science when they create your program.
  • Periodize your training to break out of plateaus and maintain progress
  • Sometimes-therapist. Personal trainers are educated in Psychology of Exercise and often end up acting as your life coach or pretend cognitive behavioral therapist.
  • Improved mobility. Your shitty posture and sedentary lifestyle have left you unable to comfortably sit in a squat or raise you arms over your head. It can be undone!
  • Learn to workout safely, correctly and efficiently
  • Prevent overtraining and time wasters like steady-state cardio
  • Increase self-efficacy and confidence in nearly any physical task or challenge
  • Reduce injury and pain
  • Improve posture and correct joint instability and muscle imbalances
  • Learn cool terms that will make you sound smart like ‘eccentric’, ‘abduction’, ‘compound movements’, ‘progressive overload’, ‘unilateral’
  • Improve nutrition and body composition
  • Track your progress and have someone MOTIVATING you to train despite your usual excuses
  • Learn foam rolling, active release and advanced stretching and postural exercises to do at home and at work to keep you healthy long term.
  • Reasons
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